How do you experience your life?
Have you ever understood why parents demand at certain time that their kids do wear shoes? or they must cover because it is cold (even though the kids keep saying “they are not cold”?) why does your mother force you to eat at certain point citing that you must be starving? Why (mostly father) push their children in sport fields?
If you know the answers to these type of questions, you are definitely well positioned to understand people’s source of actions.
The answer to the above question is… “inside your head”. Every body experience life inside their head. Nowhere else.
That why, each of our experiences are unique from other people. It is impossible to have the same experience with the next person. Even if you eat the same food, from the same pot at the same time, cooked by the same Chef, your experiences will be different.
Our experience is the result of how we see and consume the world.
Once we understand how we do create our reality, our world, we will then be able to influence our behaviour.
So, how do we create our reality?
Neuro Linguistic Programming is the science of studying the neurological language that is responsible of our existence communication. It teaches us that, there are Four distinguish steps in creating our unique reality that influence our behaviour.
STEP 1 – EXPERIENCE, this is our physical relationship with the world. STEP 2 – MEANING MAKING, this is when we start associating meaning to that experience. STEP 3 – FEELING MAKING, this is when we start consciously associating emotion to the experience and STEP 4 – FEEDBACK, the result and our behaviour.
In this first article, I will explore;-
STEP 1 – EXPERIENCE We are all reliant on our 5 physical senses namely Smell, Taste, Feel, Vision & Touch to experience the physical world. Some people prefer using one sense above the others. For example, a person with disability in one sensory area will develop another sensory area to compensate.
The information acquired from these senses are neutral in meaning or feeling.
Here is an example: Through your ears we do experience the bird singing. Our response to the singing is based on our meaning and feeling making processes that will go to step 2,3…
Our senses are our connector to the world. They process and deliver the information we use to create our perceptions and construct our reality. Yet, all these senses are limited based the usage and capacity.
Knowing that our reality is impacted by the limitation of our senses is a major ingredient to understanding our uniqueness.
Now that we know, we all have the same type of senses to collect information from the physical world; respecting other people view of the world is essential. It doesn’t mean accepting it, or buying into it, or not changing it – it simply means respecting it.
We have to remember that individual’s model of the world is very real to them. Their entire conditioned mind and the way they experience things is reflected in their model of their reality, their world – it’s simply their map of how the world is. It determines their reality.
Whatever behaviour a person presents, you ought to evaluate it in terms of the context in which it occurs. You need to consider their experiences before understanding the circumstances of their behaviour.